What is Foyer?
What today we refer to as foyer dinner groups were born in the Diocese of Coventry, England, in the aftermath of the massive destruction at the height of the German bombings of London and Coventry during World War II. The fourteenth-century Cathedral of St. Michael (Coventry Cathedral) was destroyed in the nine-hour blitz of 14 November 1940, but a ministry of reconciliation evolved from that destruction. Rather than dwell on the violent loss of his beloved place of worship, Provost Howard was inspired to found a ministry of reconciliation that he called the Community of the Cross and Nails. While sifting through the rubble of the cathedral, he gathered many of the old nails that had fallen among the ruins and was inspired to have them twisted together to form a cross. This cross of nails and the words “Father, Forgive” became the unifying symbol of the International Ministry of Reconciliation, a group of devout followers who believe that understanding between peoples, nations, and ideologies can come only when human beings meet and know each other as individuals. [ http://www.allsoulsdc.org]
In the mid-1960s, the staff of Coventry Cathedral began meeting in small groups to bridge differences, eventually giving these gatherings their present name. What they discovered were the strong bonds that formed from this communal experience. The concept spread to the cathedral congregation and then to Anglican churches across the country. Eventually it spread to the shores of the USA, including St. Thomas the Apostle.
The foyer groups at St. Thomas are strictly social events—sometimes dinners, sometimes brunches; sometimes picnics (I actually hosted one in my back yard when the house was under renovation), sometimes in a home, apartment, or condo; sometimes a meal at a local restaurant. They are a fun and easy way for parishioners to gather together on a regular but informal basis for purely social reasons – to enjoy one another’s company, to strengthen bonds of community, to meet new members and just to get to know other people in the parish, because we believe that participation in small groups, welcoming people into your homes, is the single best way to form personal bonds with fellow parishioners. The only constant is the presence of good food and wine (or beer)! We are Episcopalians, after all!
Foyer groups are what the members of each group decide to make them. It is a chance to visit and socialize outside of church with people from across the parish. There are no “rules,” and there surely is nothing that says you have to host a sit down dinner in your home. Each dinner group rotates having a meal at each group member’s home. The host usually provides the main course. The other group members each bring an appetizer, a salad, a dessert, or beverages. In some cases, the host of each month does the entire meal, with the guests bringing appetizers and beverages. It is up to the group to decide how they want to manage the food part.
Here’s what Foyer groups are not: they are not a Southern Homes tour, they are not an Iron Chef competition, nor are they a page out of Martha Stewart Living. They are casual gatherings where the focus is on fellowship and friendship, conviviality and conversation. We meet each other where we live, and accept our surroundings as they are just as God accepts us as we are.
Dinner groups are formed with 5 to 7 people—singles, couples, young people, retirees, people with school-aged children, empty nesters, etc. In other words, it is a cross-section of St Thomas. Newcomers are especially invited to join one of the groups. You can even invite your Rector! The groups are put together randomly, such that each of us might have the opportunity to get to know others in the parish who may be outside our normal circle of acquaintances or Sunday morning coffee conversations. We do our very best not to have the same folks in two consecutive foyers. One of the fun parts is naming the foyer groups—books of the Bible, English cathedrals, the seven deadly sins, the seven virtues and former Bishops of Dallas. The foyer stays together for six months (January to June and/or July through December) and then re-ups for a new group for the next six months.
If you have never participated in Foyer before, why not give it a try? If you have sat out a few rounds, consider rejoining. Look for the sign-up sheet inserts that will appear in the Doubter and in the Service Order Bulletin during the first two Sundays in June. New groups will be forming soon for July – December 2021.
As we take our first steps in regathering, we can form groups in two ways. The January – July 2020 groups had barely gotten started when protocols forced us to suspend activities. If you wanted to maintain your previous group we can do that, but there is no obligation to do so. New folks to St. Thomas and others we have gathered into our circle can also be added provided the groups don’t get too big – an upper limit around 8. I can always form additional groups but do let me know if you want to bring new friends into your existing group. Some may now have significant others since we last organized. They are welcomed as well. If you are brand spanking new to St. Thomas, I encourage you to get to know us.
Michael Legacy
