St Thomas

Take a moment to bring to mind some people who have inspired you, and who have had a significant, positive impact on your life. As you reflect on who came to mind just now, whether they were a parent, friend, sister, brother, family member, teacher, coach, boss, spiritual leader, or political leader, I imagine that there is something they all have in common—each of them was a person of integrity. The word integrity shares the same root as the word integration. A person with integrity has a high degree of integration between what they say and how they live. Such a person “walks the talk” and embodies in their actions what they say with their words. Integrity is based on the highest spiritual values of what it means to live a good life, transcending political, religious, and other differences. People from different perspectives will be open to listening to and…

In 1996, psychologist Roy Bauermeister conducted a fascinating experiment on will power. He invited a large group of people into a room filled with the smell of fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies. He sat them at tables and then brought to each table two bowls. One bowl contained radishes and the other chocolate chip cookies. Half of the people were told they could eat only the radishes and to use their will power to avoid eating any of the cookies. The other half of the group were told they could skip the radishes and eat as many cookies as they wished. Ten minutes later, everyone was led to another room where they were given (unknown to them at the time) an unsolvable geometry problem. The group of people who had just eaten the cookies worked an average of nineteen minutes trying to solve the problem before giving up. The group of…

“Acting tough is about external appearances. It involves creating a persona that convinces other people you’re impervious to pain. True mental strength involves working on your character. Mentally strong people are willing to be vulnerable, and quite often, people confuse their openness and honesty with frailty.” – Amy Morin We live in uncertain times that present daily challenges to our emotional well-being. If you are wondering how to cultivate the mental strength to move forward, I recommend an insightful book by psychotherapist Amy Morin. Her book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success might be helpful. If reading a whole book on emotional well-being creates more stress, then you will be pleased to know you can find the “Cliff Notes” version of her book in an article she wrote for Inc.—you can read…

“Practice the pause. Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you’re about to react harshly, and you’ll avoid doing and saying things you’ll later regret.” – Lori Deschene I was reminded of the power of pausing while riding my road bike earlier today as I was climbing some very steep hills. (Yes, I am aware that I write a lot about what I experience and learn while on my bike. It is where I spend a lot of time these days and do some of my best thinking.) As I neared the top of an exceptionally long and steep hill, I looked down at my bike computer and saw that my heart rate monitor was reading 156 beats per minute. My elevated heart rate, along with the high temperature and humidity, gave me reason to pause – literally. I found some cool shade, drank some water,…